self love

Self-Love September: Week 4

Four weeks in already??? Where has this month gone? Barely any days left of self-love September now and I feel like I’ve made no progress.

We’ve had guests almost all of September, it might sound like an excuse but, for me, it’s been hugely stressful and left me completely emotionally wiped out. The progress I made earlier in the month has gone down the toilet; I caught myself this morning telling myself how stupid I was, I don’t even remember why.

Even with a few days left I feel like I’ve failed this month. I am telling myself that self-love is a daily practice, it is not a destination, it is not just 1 month, but I so wanted to make a change this month and I haven’t, well, I started and then it all went to hell in a hand-basket…

I know I probably just feel this way because I am SO exhausted. There are no words to tell you just how emotionally drained I am. I feel like I have nothing left, nothing at all, nothing to give to anyone, not even myself. The tank is empty. But my negative self-talk tells me that that is all excuses, that I should be able to deal with this stuff, that I’m making it up. I’m not, I know deep down that I’m not, but my head is telling me over and over that I’m weak, lazy and selfish, generally an awful human being.

I haven’t written even half the number of self-love inspired posts that I wanted to this month. I haven’t even been able to keep up to date with Kelly-Ann’s videos and soundcloud offerings. Basically, despite all my good intentions, this month has been a wash out and I am utterly disappointed because it’s a whole year until the next one.

I will, of course, try to be more self-loving anyway, but I wanted this month to be the start of it, to be the time to put into place all the good habits and kick the bad ones, and that just hasn’t happened. So right now I’m feeling pretty rubbish about myself, which isn’t very self-loving!

How has your self-love September been? Have you managed to kick those negative thoughts into touch? Or build some good, self-loving habits?

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