So far in my life I’ve had just monogamous relationships, it’s just happened that way and that’s with that being the norm’ in society I suppose that’s how it usually happens for most people. But I intend for things to change in my next relationship. I want to give an open relationship a try for several reasons; practicality, logic and experience.
Practically speaking I genuinely believe many people aren’t built to be monogamous, some are of course and that’s fine, but why try to fit a square peg in a round hole? It irritates me somewhat that people are so down on poly folk and anyone who has open relationships. You may be interested to know that the majority of people I know who had monogamous relationships are now divorced, separated or conducting affairs, the most successful relationships I know are people in open relationships. I’m speaking in general of course, there are successful monogamous relationships and failed poly ones, but in my experience not so much.
Logically, to me at least, it makes sense to not bother trying to force someone who wants to experience variety in life to eat one ice cream flavour ’til death do us part. Personally I’m not all about trying everything, but if my partner can’t give me everything I want in a relationship then I fail to see why, within agreed parameters, I shouldn’t get it elsewhere. And it’s not just for my benefit either, my sex drive isn’t much cop and I’d rather see my partner happy getting it elsewhere than desperate and trying to stay ‘faithful.’
Following on from that is my experience which has shown me that many men (there I go generalising again, prepare yourself!) are incapable of keeping it in their pants. Yes I know plenty of women are that way too, but I’m speaking from my life experience and while my most recent ex was determined to cheat despite the offer of an open relationship, I believe previous relationships, and possibly future ones, may be more successful with more freedom in them.
I know that open relationships take a lot of work and communication, but that should be put into any healthy relationship anyway and it’s something I actually enjoy about relationships anyway.
What do you think about open relationships? Is it something you’d consider or would it be too much to deal with?