For this week’s Writing Workshop from the lovely Josie, I have chosen prompt number 3: “What skill would you like to learn?” And I am also cheating slightly, because it’s not one skill specifically, but rather a set of skills that would make me, in my eyes, the “perfect” wife.
For several years now I have wanted to go to finishing school, watching Ladette to Lady obviously fuelled my desire, but it’s something I feel is important. When I got engaged I started looking into it even further and found that some places do pre wedding courses and was incredibly excited, they also do mother/daughter ones which I would definitely look into when (or if) I have a little girl!
But I digress!
Wife fail #1: I want to be able to flower arrange, currently I suck! I can’t grow flowers, pick them properly or arrange them, it’s something that bugs me, a lot, I like having flowers in the house but rarely do because I have no idea how to make them look nice.
Wife fail #2: I don’t cook pretentious food, ever. I cook homely meals, that’s fine, no problems there. No problems baking wise either, I can whip up some cookies or a cake in a flash, but posh, pretentious food is not my forté. I’ve never tried and I think the main reason is because I’m picky with food, so who knows, maybe I could make something very tiny and serve it beautifully on an enormous plate, but I never do.
Wife fail #3: Make up. I fail at make up, not in an epic way, but it’s not how I want it. Maybe I’m not using the right stuff, or skimping in the wrong places or just doing it wrong, but it’s never perfect. Ditto my hair! And my wardrobe. So generally “how I look” is probably just the fail! I have zero fashion sense and no idea how to put an outfit together (please no one tell Gok!) and it is definitely something I need help with. I’d love to be able to dress as well as Charlotte (of Sex and the City fame) all the time.
Wife fail #4: Etiquette. I am far from ladette, but I am also pretty far from lady! I’ve cut back on the swearing but I can be quite crude at times, and very rarely do words get to my mouth via the brain, in fact it seems to be a missing link! Even though I’ve picked up bits of knowledge over time, I don’t feel confident in it because it hasn’t been taught to me.
Wife fail #5: I can’t dance. That may be my biggest shame, I would love to be whisked around the dance floor without panicking! As far as I’m aware I don’t look completely useless, but I have no confidence at all in my dancing abilities, despite doing it a lot in private. I definitely need the moves!
Wife fail #6: I’m not the best at acting respectful even though I mean to be. I think it’s the way I phrase things, rather than what I’m asking/saying, but either way I hate it. I can’t even just keep my mouth shut because, as I mentioned before, there is a lack of connection between my brain and my mouth! Every time I do it I want to slap myself, if I notice, but by then it’s too late. *sigh*
There is probably more but, considering this was the happy option of the two possibilities I saw this week, I’m going to shut up before I change my OH’s mind! So overall I think I’m currently scoring a 2/10 on the “Wife-o-meter” and that is not acceptable!
Edit: Having read some of the feedback on this post I’m sensing it’s come across wrong, so I’m adding a little edit here! I do want to do these things for me, because they interest me and they are things I want to be able to do, my OH loves me as I am (thankfully!) and would, I hope, argue that I’m at least 9/10 on the Wife-o-meter already! Additionally, I am actually very happy with myself, although evidently this doesn’t come across :s I spent a lot of time hating myself and changing who I was for other people and have finally reached a place where I am happy with who I am. Rather than putting pressure on myself, it actually makes me feel cozy and warm to do homely things like that. *makes note to try to be clearer
P.s. my OH’s guest post is now up and you can find it here, it’s also very good!